Locked In A Room With My Dark Passenger

When I decided to get gastric sleeve surgery I thought that my addiction to junk food would end. Boy, was I wrong.

I still am addicted to junk food. I crave pizza, sugary foods, Whoppers, cheesy fries, and so on. I do not crave healthy fruits and vegetables.

But even though I'm still addicted to junk food, I'm now physically unable to engorge myself on all the food that was making me fat in the first place. While this is good, it's like taking a crackhead and locking him in isolation so he can sober up. The man doesn't stop craving crack, he just doesn't have access to it anymore.

Drug addicts refer to the voice in their head that tells them to do the drugs their "dark passenger". My dark passenger has gone from being a powerful, commanding presence to one that whines and begs for a fix. He still has psychological power. But my body is simply unable to listen to him.

I'd be lying if I didn't say that that's not a happy experience. But I will have to learn to adjust to this new life.

As far as my weight loss goes, I hit a plateau after I lost 50 pounds. My weight hasn't budged since Monday. I talked to a friend who has also had the surgery and she said that's normal. I can expect to go a week or two without losing any weight, then lose 20 pounds overnight. I'd rather just see it come off a couple of pounds a day like I was the first few weeks after the surgery, but as long as it comes off I'll be happy about it.

I'm also back to work, which is why I haven't written in a while. I'll make it a point to write more. I want all of my experiences to be documented.