Tuesday, March 7, 2017

If You Want to do Something Right...

It didn't take long for me to get back to my peak strength levels on the Starting Strength program. I even exceeded my previous bests on my squat (235x5 reps). After doing that, I decided that I need to work on becoming faster and have better endurance as well.

Some time last year, I heard about a book called Hybrid Training, which is one of the few books that is dedicated to making someone an all-around superior athlete. Their workouts look great, but they're suited for someone who is in moderately good shape in all areas. My speed and my endurance are lacking.

With that in mind, I decided to start a bodybuilding routine to keep my current strength levels, and be able to run until I can run three miles in under 30 minutes.

I decided to pick the Buff Dudes 12 Week Plan, Third Edition. For those that don't know, Buff Dudes are two fitness models that have their own YouTube channel. There's a thousand different weightlifting channels on YouTube, but their videos are by far the most entertaining.

Here's a playlist of the videos from that plan.

As far as bodybuilding plans go, it's great. If your primary goal is to get a great looking body, I highly recommend it.

And the first phase of the workout was good, too. There were only two days when you worked your legs (and this is only because Buff Dudes are under the mistaken impression that the deadlift is a back exercise and not a leg exercise), so I was able to run on the other days I worked out.

Unfortunately, by the time phase two hit, I was working my legs three times a week. Two actual leg days, and one back day where you're doing deadlifts. I couldn't run with a shit on phase two.

Watching their videos, one of the brothers said that he wasn't even doing cardio anymore because the weight training was too exhausting. And all they do for cardio is fast walking!

Walking is fine if all you want to do is gain cardiovascular endurance. But I feel the need, the need for...

You 80s kids know the rest.


"Well, fuck it", I told myself. "If you want to do something right, you're going to have to do it yourself."

So, I created my own workout plan, mixing all of what I know about lifting and running, and doing a goal assessment.

My long term goals are:
1. A squat and deadlift of 450 pounds
2. A bench press of 300 pounds
3. Be able to do pullups
4. Run a sub 8:00 mile

My short term goals are:
1. At least maintain my current strength levels, if not increase them
2. Run three miles under 30:00
3. Decrease body fat so I can run faster
4. Do this in as short as workout as possible (I still got kids at home!)

The short term goals are harder than they sound. I've found since having bariatric surgery that the following is true:

1. Gaining strength is easy
2. Losing body fat is easy
3. Doing both is extremely, extremely hard

So this plan isn't intended to gain strength. It's just meant to keep what I have. If my strength increases, great, but it's not necessary.

I'm combining bodybuilding with megsquats' program to get you to do your first pullup, and Higdon's novice 5k plan.

The first exercise is the primary exercise, done in four sets of 10/8/6/4. The exception is back day, where my primary exercise is the reverse pullup from the megsquats routine. The primary exercise is meant to make you worn completely down by the time it's over. The weight you lift is based on your one rep max. There's plenty of apps to download to your phone (and this website) to help calculate your one rep max. Based on that, you figure out how much weight to lift on each set.

For example, if you know that you can lift 205 pounds for five reps, your calculated one rep max would be 236 pounds. Based on that, you would do a set routine of 180x10, 190x8, 205x6, and 215x4. You're rounding up to the nearest five on every one.

By the time you're done with the first exercise, the muscles you worked should be officially done for the day. That's where the rest of the workout comes in.

You have to do at least one more isolation exercise for that muscle group for 3 sets of 10, and then on most days, you'll be doing two accessory exercises for the arms for 3 sets of 10.

The idea is that you work your body past its breaking point. It builds endurance, and you get to spend the rest of the week recovering, so you don't have to worry about muscle strain, either.

So here's the first week of my six week plan to get me ready for Hybrid Training:

Sunday (Chest and Biceps):
1.5 mile run
Reverse Pullups
Bench Press: 10/8/6/4
Cable Crossovers: 3x10
Bicep Curl: 3x10
Zottman Curl: 3x10

Tuesday (Back):
1.5 mile run
Reverse Pullups
T-Bar Row: 3x10
Pull downs: 3x10

Thursday (Shoulders and Triceps):
1.5 mile run
Reverse Pullups
Overhead Dumbbell Press: 12/10/8
Barbell Upright Row: 3x10
Overhead Tricep Extension: 3x10
Overhand Cable Push-Downs: 3x10

Friday:
Squats: 10/8/6/4
Deadlifts: 1x5
30 minute incline walk on treadmill

The running routine falls in line with the Higdon program. The next week would be a 1.75 mile run on the first and third run days, 1.5 miles on the second, and 35 minutes of incline walking on leg day.

There's a lot of people that like to save the cardio for after the weight lifting. When it comes to running, I like to do it first, just because running is always harder for me than lifting.

As the weeks pass, if I find that I'm not able to break my muscles down into mush after the first exercise no matter how much I lift, I'll add another compound exercise (for example, an Incline Bench Press on chest day). The goal is to leave the gym feeling like I've got my ass kicked. The workout is broken down enough to avoid injury, short enough to have a life outside of the gym, and can meet my short term fitness goals.

So far, the workout has been great. I've noticed that my strength is increasing slightly, and even though this isn't my goal, I'm seeing a lot of added muscle on my body. While I can say that it's not my goal to look strong, it feels pretty damn good to see that in the mirror. :)

If you decide to give this routine a go yourself, remember to see a doctor before beginning any new exercise program. That's my legal disclaimer so you can't sue me. Enjoy!

Monday, March 6, 2017

Time

I don't have enough time.

Time for what? Everything.

I'm constantly working. I was promised more money at my new job. I get paid more by the hour, but I also work a lot less hours than I did than at my previous job. This means I'm making less money.

So I beg for overtime. I get what I can, but my new job picks overtime on a seniority based scale. My old job had an overtime policy of, "Just give it to The Grasshopper. He'll take it." That was much more preferable to my current situation.

What little time I have when I'm not working, I either spend at the gym or watching my kids.

I make this complaint because after I posted about my return as a political blogger and activist, I literally have no time to do either.

If you don't write about politics everyday, good luck keeping up with the clusterfuck that our latest presidency has become. Another day, another new heaping pile of bullshit. As of today, Trump is accusing Obama of having tapped his phones during the 2016 campaign, and is doing so because he read an article on a right-wing blog.

Trump has access to literally everything that our government can get its hands on, and he's relying on morning news shows and conspiracy-theory websites instead of our intelligence agencies for information. It's beyond mind-boggling stupid.

And yet tomorrow, there will be some other clusterfuck coming from this administration. What will he do next that will boggle the mind? Start a dog fighting ring? Make a sex tape? Start a war based on his viewing of Killer Clowns from Outer Space? We don't fucking know. We just know that he'll be a bigger idiot than he was the day before, and it'll be equal parts entertaining and horrifying. We'll keep worrying about how low our country has sunk while being mesmerized by the spectacle all at the same time.

I don't have the time to keep up with all of this dumbfuckery. How do you occasionally blog about politics when Trump's dumbfuckery comes at you at a 1,000 miles an hour?

I wanted to be more politically active in the real world as well. I was hoping to attend political meetings, attend some rallies and protests, and otherwise do my part to make some change.

That's hard to do when you have two kids at home, and work 48-56 hours a week.

Every time I see some rally or meetup on Facebook, I look at the day. It's always on a day that I'm working. I tell myself, "Well, maybe I can do it before work...oh, wait. I've got kids. Nevermind."

A few months ago, I watched an incredibly cathartic video of the white supremacist shitbag known as Richard Spencer get punched in the face by an Anarchist.

There's been hundreds of videos, but this one is my personal favorite

I started reading up on Anarchism after that, because I knew that they didn't believe in the concept of a government, but didn't know much else about them. It turns out they don't like any groups at all. No governments, no corporations, nothing. Just all men on their own.

I don't agree with that philosophy, but it is damn nice to see them punching Nazis. I can disagree with their philosophy all I want; if there comes a time for punching Nazis, I'm calling them. You can't count on liberals for that shit.

One of the things I did read on them mentioned that most Anarchists are active either in a) Early adulthood, or b) The years after they turn fifty.

The author explained (sorry for no link, I can't find it right now), that this is because like just about every other activist, they get married, have kids, and have to work to provide and pay bills. Raising a family takes priority over setting the world on fire.

So it's going to be up to the college kids and the grandparents to save the world. Again. As per usual.

I still hope to do what I can when there's time. My wife will stop teaching in the summer, so hopefully I can do something other than call my representatives until they get sick of hearing from me (that's about all I can do right now).

In the meantime, I still wear this around town while I run my errands:

Come at me, wingnuts. Y'all ain't shit